G20/G8 Coverage

Posted by Mika on Jun 8, 2010 in International Summits | 1 comment

The G20/G8 has been taking over the news in my neck of the woods, and I’m semi-happy to say that soon I’ll be in the thick of it all. I will go to the G20 protests, I will do my bit to cover the amusing bits on this blog, and I will leave before that shit gets Chinese. I am happier to say that I’ll also be in the thick of the G8. My family’s cottage in Muskoka is within the Deerhurst security area and I’ve already shown my ID to a Mountie, so… we’re in, kids.

The G8, I think, will be the fun summit, because it is the shallow summit. The leaders will be there for one day. They will be playing golf. I imagine this means that Obama is going to be in a foursome with Merkel, Cameron and whoever speaks for Putin these days, while Harper, Berlisconi and new Japanese PM Naoto Kan get to babysit Sarkozy on the second tier (“Eef I du not make zee swing, zen how will ze people of France know I am ze leader?” he’ll rationalize as his aids begin to photoshop his face onto Tiger Woods’ body in a panic) I was talking to a woman who worked at the LCBO in Huntsville this weekend, and apparently Deerhurst has been getting calls from “Europeans” asking about how the leaders will be protected from that vicious Canadian insect called “the mosquito”.
“It was Burlisconi’s office, wasn’t it?” I asked the woman, she said she didn’t know.
“Did they sound Italian?”
She shrugged.
“What did the office sound like? Could you hear the giggles of young girls and the splishing and splashing of a bubble bath?” The woman stared just stared at me blankly and double-bagged my Steamwhistle.

The Huntsville protests are also shaping up to be way better then the ones in Toronto. So far the Harper government doesn’t think they’ll have to control crowds, so unlike Toronto, they won’t be transmitting soundwaves which creep in through your ears to ever-so-gently shake your brain, and the Huntsville Forester says there is going to be a fry truck! Hey, I think when we’re all up there with our signs and our lawn chairs and everything, there will be no good reason to not just do the whole protest from inside Tim Hortons. Now how perfect does that sound?

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