Second Year Poli-Sci Majors Just Ate My Face
As some of you may know, I occasionally contribute to an American politics blog called The Politicizer. These occasions are usually very few and far between, as I have my own blog to hardly work on, but recently I gave them a satirical peice I wrote about Thomas Jefferson and the Tea Party because I actually thought it might be too dignified for this blog. In almost 800 words I don’t once mention bodily fluids and yes, I used spell check. I was always going to include a link on Polonoscopy because I thought it was a pretty cute piece, I figured Politicizer might like the traffic and why write something new when you can add a link to something old??
So..ummmm… here is the link:
You may notice that after the link there are 17 COMMENTS, and a number of them are FUCKING CRAZY. It starts out fine, just regular… “you’re a liberal and I hate you” totally normal stuff, it’s all good! I even add a lighthearted sarcastic response. Then things heat up a little, and get kind of personal. Like, “your Mamma didn’t raise you right” personal. I’m about three comments away from sincerely being called a whore. Sincerely.
Top Ten Favorite Comment Excerpts:
1. I’ll let Christopher Hitchens do my dirty work..
2. I guess this is mostly the fault of the Canadian school system, anyway.
3. Nice hit on Canadian socialists and schooling, too!
4. I was at the original tea party, and it was a lot more fun than this crap you guys get all goosed about. We dressed as Injuns! (That’s right… Injuns)
5. Should I keep going, or would you like simply to fade back into the bushes as befits one thoroughly discredited as a fraud? Be ashamed.
6. Maybe this is funny to you… (It was!
)
7. When Canada starts to interest me, I will learn about it
8. Rekai is correct, hilarious, and takes a reasoned and studied approach to the issue. (Finally!)
9. I think you better go back to comic books. This format is overwhelming your synapses. (Not my SYNAPSES!)
10. (And my ultimate favorite….) Just because The Politicizer is intended for 90′s kids doesn’t make it a joke – as young adults we are responsible for carrying the torch to the next generation. (Hells yeah you are guys, keep hangin’ on)
And just so everyone knows, I was being nice in that article. There were more things I could have said about Thomas Jefferson. He owned slaves, ok? AND FUCKED THEM.
If you must comment, please remember that although we at Polonoscopy enjoy our politics with a smattering of vagina jokes, we are ladies and gentlemen of a sort. No flame wars, just wit ok?
EDIT: I can’t believe I forgot this one. Definitely my favourite.
11. Oh, by the way, I don’t sip my Earl Grey while reading Locke at home, I do it while studying how to produce the energy that drives your very existence.
MY VERY EXISTENCE.
That’s my facebook status right now, not going to lie.
No related posts.

Polonoscopy is a site devoted to political fluff. While I do appreciate that there are important issues out there… with respect… eh… don’t really care. Not here anyway, not now, that is not what Polonoscopy is about. Fluff. It’s all about image and perception in politics. Rather than vote for someone based on a record of public service and commitment to the meaningful issues of the day, wouldn’t you rather vote for someone who’s personality seems similar if only slightly more impressive then your own? Of course, we all would.
Rekai, you’re the best.
Welcome to the internet. Enjoy your stay and try the veal. Oh, and post your piece on /r/Politics.
LOLZ! This kept me amused for so long. I’m even amused right now.
Hey Mika,
I also just started writing for the Politicizer–I thought your column was pretty funny. I definitely got the satire (but maybe that’s because I’m a lowly criminal justice major, not a second year poli sci major). anyway, i hope you keep writing for the site- its nice to read someone who doesn’t take herself too seriously.
-josh akman
Thank you once again Mika. I laughed my face off.
Although you shouldn’t reply anything to these ameritards. You’ll never read it too often, remember: arguing on the internet is like running for the Special Olympics; even if you win you’re still retarded.