An Evening with Paul Martin: As Appealing as it Sounds
On Thursday evening I had the oppurtunity to attend a Trinity College function called “Conversations with the Chancellor: An Evening with Paul Martin”. That is to say, Canada’s former Prime Minister, Paul Martin. The former Finance Minister, Paul Martin. One of the 7,2oo Canadians politicians who takes credit for the Canadian banking system’s relative non-collapseyness, Paul Martin. The guy who ran the country for three years who you’ve already forgotten about, Paul Martin. Remember when you used to turn on CBC and there would be that guy with the floppy chins and the sad eyes who seemed to spit a little when he talked? Paul Martin! Also “The Chancellor” is Bill Graham. That is to say… you...
Read MoreOpen Your Legs, Ladies, It’s Time to Think About Politics
Trashing Micheal Ignatieff is really cool right now. In the Canadian media, that is. Everywhere else in the world they envy us for having such a respected intellectual willing to play the crude political game, but fuck them and their perspective, right? Sorry. Honestly. Honestly I think it’s ok that Ignatieff is getting it from the media right now, because everyone should get their turn. Harper got his turn, he lived through it, now the major papers collectively licking his ass. Dion got it, Martin got it, Chretian got it, everyone has their turn… some manage to tough it out, some don’t. This is what Canadian politics is, so… Game On. Personally, I think Ignatieff can take it. My problem today is that, in...
Read MoreTim Hortons Expands Harper’s Visibility
Today Stephan Harper announced during a Tim Horton’s press conference that Canada will no longer play host to a G8 summit, as the summit has grown to become a G20. This makes sense as Canada is not longer one of the eight biggest economies in the world and shouldn’t even be invited to a G8 summit, let alone host one. But back to more important matters… Tim Horton’s? For a press conference? Really?? I know that people have this idea that Canadian culture can be defined by a sub-par coffee and doughnut chain, but I really don’t think it’s an idea worth promoting. We have beautiful spaces in this country, many majestic staircases from which a Prime Minister can descend to a well mounted podium....
Read MoreWhen You’re Doing the G20
G20 Spouses Yesterday in Pittsburgh while the G20 leaders were doing their thing… you know, talking about the economy, making plans, leading the world, snapping towels at each other in the change room, Michelle Obama kept the G20 “spouses” entertained. How did she do it? Why, with fresh produce, of course! Michelle took the girls (and one dude) to a working farm owned by Teresa Heinz Kerry. There they listened to some jazz, ate some greens and waxed on and on about important it is for children of the world to eat healthy while comparing their classy lady suits and napkin folding techniques. Then I imagine that some of them might remember that they themselves used to be lawyers and CEOs and budding politicians, maybe...
Read MoreYeltsin’s Munchies
I miss the days of soft power in Russia. I miss the diplomacy, I miss the sense of humour wraught from international humiliation, I miss the days when a Russian president was actually supposed to leave office. Perhaps I just miss Boris Yeltsin. I would take that man’s red face and sporadic organ failure over Putin’s Moobs any day. There stood Russian president Boris Yeltsin, drunk and wearing only his underpants while he tried to hail a cab across from the White House. Through slurred speech, he explained to U.S. officials that he’d only wanted a pizza. This story is from a new book about Bill Clinton (THE CLINTON TAPES!!) coming out in a few weeks. The book is chalked full of little anacdotes about the Clinton...
Read MoreObama Finally Connects
First of all… I know. It’s been ages since I posted. I’d like to thank all my loyal readers (Mum, Dad, Natalie, Goo… Mark?) for returning. So, shit’s been going down for a while now. There is no longer going to be a federal election in Canada, the Americans will soon be voting on health care, Gordon Brown has a secret tax hike, something about missals, there are still a bunch of wars going on, Iran, North Korea, Somalia. There is just so much. But only one thing could really bring me back…. KAAANYE!! Everyone has likely heard the stream of Obama “off the record” at MSNBC calling Kanye a jackass. Honestly, I’d be surprised if Obama didn’t know he was going to end up on TMZ....
Read MoreAbout the Site
Polonoscopy is a site devoted to political fluff. While I do appreciate that there are important issues out there… with respect… eh… don’t really care. Not here anyway, not now, that is not what Polonoscopy is about. Fluff. It’s all about image and perception in politics. Rather than vote for someone based on a record of public service and commitment to the meaningful issues of the day, wouldn’t you rather vote for someone who’s personality seems similar if only slightly more impressive then your own? Of course, we all would.